The New York Times parenting blog published an interesting piece the other day titled An Adoption: Six Months Later. The author writes about her difficult bonding experience with her biological sons versus her immediate attachment to her adopted daughter.
Now, maybe that has to do with the fact that her bio sons were newborns and her daughter was older when she was adopted–maybe the author just didn’t take to the newborn stage. (It sounds like she had a bit of a Grumpy Baby.) Or maybe she truly just bonded more naturally with her adopted daughter and would have no matter what age she was when adopted. Either way, it speaks to the truth that attachment and bonding does not rely or depend on biological ties.
Just because you give birth to a baby does not mean you will become immediately attached. And just because you adopt a baby doesn’t mean you immediately won’t.